All Whites Snub FA Challenge

Soccer NZ today rejected a request from the FA for an England v NZ

friendly to be played in the NZ winter, saying the game would likely be

'hardly worth it' following lowly England's recent loss to a second-string

Australia side.

'We'd have to make entry to the game free to attract a crowd to see

a low-calibre side like England, and the takings from the raffles and

sausage-sizzle probably wouldn't be enough to cover the cost of the hot

water for the showers, especially when you look at how many bloody players

they have', said Soccer NZ Chairman Bill Franklin from his offices at the

Poenamo Pub today.

'It's a bit of shame', added Franklin 'cause it looks like they've

got some decent young blokes in their team, and developing soccer nations

like England need exposure to high-standard opponents like the Oceania

teams'.

'But if they can't beat Australia, who we've been using as a

practise team over the last few seasons, then they can p*ss off.'

New Zealand All-Whites captain Harry Ngata echoed the Chairman's

concerns, and although thought England could take heart from their recent

result, doubted many of the NZ players could get time off from milking cows

to play the game, and also noted that the game would probably be 'smack in

the middle of lambing season'.

'We're probably better off just concentrating on our upcoming match

with Tonga', Ngata said.

Meanwhile Australia coach Frank Farina has come under fire at home

about the disappointing 3-1 result. He today dismissed criticism regarding

his reluctance to pick 'proper Aussies' for the England match as 'bloody

bullsh*t', instead claiming that the European-based players need a chance to

prove themselves too.

Farina hit back at top NSL clubs, Wollongong Wolves and Brisbane

Stars who were reluctant to release their top players for the international

claiming the match was 'farcical', and insisting that they were better off

retaining their top players for the upcoming matches with league

high-flyers, the Auckland-based Soccer KiNgZ. In some cases clubs were

seeking multi-hundred dollar payouts to release the players for the match

dubiously billed as an

'international', recognising that England is not really a proper

country anyway, just a principality like Wales.

'I'm glad we didn't pull all the blokes from the NSL (National

Soccer League) over there, it could have been an absolute bloody

embarrassment. We could have been lookin' at 6- or 8-nil if we'd had our

Australia-based players, and that's no good for anyone' said Farina.

'Plus with the cost of the flights, it would have been a waste of

bloody money.' Farina's frustration was evident, noting that England coach

Sven Goran Eriksson wouldn't even buy him a beer after the match, despite

his £2m a year pay-packet.

'Swedish w*nker' Farina was heard to have uttered.

Farina was said to be happy with the way the second-stringers

performed, but insisted they were still 'a bunch of bloody poofters who

should be playin' a proper game like Aussie Rules or League.'